Neo stood in front of a door, it is just a original door, no
different than any others, but he knows by the time he enter
this door, he will change the world, he will save millions of
life, he will free mankind.
Neo took a deep breath, and than open the door with the key
in his hand, the only key for this door, the key which the
Keymaker sacrificed his life for it. The door grew like a
thousand of lights, he knew now is the time, he walk toward
the light with nothing but peace in his heart.
Behind the light a cold, humorless man sitting in the middle
of a large empty room.
"Hello Neo." The man spoke with no facial expression.
"You know my name." Neo said.
"Of course, I designed you."
"Excuse me!?"
The man raise both his hands. "I'm The Architect, the creator
of the Matrix and u will ask me..."
"Why are you here?" Neo's eyes twinkled, he felt like he is a 12
years old boy standing in front of the principal.
"That is not important, the most important question is your
true purpose to be here." Architect replied. "You think you
know the answer for this question. You are here because you
are told to come here, you are here because you believe you
can stop the war between humans and machines."
Neo look straight into Architect's eyes. "Than are you here to
stop me?"
"Why should I stop you if I'm the one who guided you here."
Architect said.
Neo shook his head. "I believe it was the Oracle who guided
me here."
"Yes, of course, the Oracle, that is her purpose, her job is to
guide you here. Did you notice all the people you met had
helped you to reach here. Morpheus, Keymaker... and of
course, Trinity." Architect pointed to one side of the wall,
Trinity stood there cover with blood.
"Trinity!" Neo shouted, even he know that is just a image.
"Tell me Neo, what is real? Not long ago you live in the world
of Matrix, you believe your senses there, everything you see,
you hear, the taste, the smell, the pain. And than you wake up,
you believe Matrix just a virtual reality, your world was
destory by machines. You believe you will save Zion, a
underground city which house a quarter of million people,
you believe you are Neo, The One. Do you really know what
is real? What if I tell you Zion is just another Matrix?"
"What?" Neo look around and realized he is no longer in the room, he
is inside Zion, people are everywhere.
"Remember Morpheus told you when Matrix first built, a man
was born inside who can remake the Matrix. And than he die
like every human, but he will born once again and free
mankind from the Matrix. What if I tell you it was just a
myth?" Architect said. "It was back at around 2050. You
already know the human destroy the sky, but there was never
a war between mankind and machines, it was a war between
humans themself."
Neo saw it this time, Architect raise one of his hand and the
background suddenly change, they are now in the middle of a
battleground, jets in the sky, tanks driven beside them.
"Humans create Artificial intelligence to serve them. Artificial
intelligence then create the Matrix, not a prison for the mind
but instead a heaven for human to live happy ever after."
Architect said.
Neo laughed."Bullshit, what about the human energy fields?
They are all over the world."
Architect nodded. "You believe they are tools for the
machines to draw the life out of human beings as their energy
source, but they are in fact created so humans can survive in
this unlivable earth.We have the Matrix for human minds but
human can't survive without the body. Machines have to
follow orders which form from the Three Laws of Robotics.
A robot may not injure a human being or, through inaction,
allow a human being to come to harm; A robot must obey
orders given to it by human beings, except where such orders
would conflict with the First Law; A robot must protect its
own existence as long as such protection does not conflict
with the First or Second Law."
"I saw machines destory our ships, I saw agents hunting us
down one by one." Neo shouted.
"There once was a wise man said that man is innately evil, all
people are born with natural tendencies toward a taste for
beauty and profit, a susceptibility to hate and jealousy."
Architect raise his hand and they are back to the empty room.
"Humans never get enough of anything, they always want
more and more, the first Matrix I designed was a perfect
world, everyone got what they need, but perhaps too perfect
for humans, they refused to accept the fact that there are no
need for more, in result we lose them. So I have to redesigned
the Matrix one after one to fit the human basic needs, hunger
for power and money. Zions was then create as a sub Matrix
to suit the resistance part of human minds, Zion is the
opposite of Matrix, the negative part, a quarantine zone for
minds."
"So Zion is not real? But why I cannot see the code as I in the
Matrix?" Neo breathe heavily.
"It bring out the main question, the question you been looking
for, the reason why you are here. Neo, you should awared by
now, you are nothing but a program of Matrix......"
"No! No! I don't believe you." Neo muttered to himself.
"Your purpose is to reboot the Matrix when it is in danger,
you giving powers in Matrix to fulfill this purpose, but they
are only limited in the main Matrix, not in sub Matrix-Zion.
Every time the resistance human minds in the Zion had
grown strong enough to threaten the main Matrix itself, you
will be born and guided to the Source, to end everything."
Architect said.
"What if I say no?" Neo felt sick.
Architect gave him a blank look. "The system will collapse,
approximate 99% of human beings will die, as for you, there
are no need for The One to be exist, you will be deleted from
the Matrix."
Neo laughed. "And you believe you can kill me? I don't think
so."
"Program choose to be self exile from the Matrix cannot be
destroy. Merovingian for example is the main program from
the original Matrix. But as the human resistance growing,
Matrix will become more and more unstable, error numbers
will arise, more and more programs will get infected. A failed
security program is already threating both Matrix and Zion."
Architect sighed. "This is the truth, your question is not about
making choices or what you believe now, is about your
purpose to be here, your purpose is to reach the Source, to
reboot Matrix. Your path is set since the day you born."
"This is your destiny, Neo." A black door appeared behind
Architect.
" Yes, this is my destiny..." Neo walk toward the door, this
time with nothing but hopeless in his heart.
Hey Sunny,
ReplyDeleteThis was quite intriguing, because it's an alternative to an actual scene in Reloaded, but it's been a while since I saw the movie so I struggled to note all the differences. As I read on it became clear how you changed things (that's a very matrixy concept, actually changing things).
You've got some interesting grammar, but it doesn't make the story any less clear. I actually really liked some of the results, like, 'The door grew like a thousand of lights'. It sounds like something from a poem I would like. (I guess English grammar would normally accept 'like a thousand lights', or 'like thousands of lights'. But I don't think you should change it)
The story assumes we've seen the matrix and we know what it looks like, which in my case I do, but you could have more description to strongly attach the reader to what's going on, so they have a clear idea of what setting the characters are in.
I think this ending seems a little light, like it didn't hit hard enough. Neo just seems to accept this, and we don't see what he's thinking that brings to him accepting it. Maybe an extra paragraph of his thoughts that lead to him losing hope and choosing to become part of the system would make it a bit more dramatic, climatic at the end?
You captured a lot of the matrix feel, I could imagine this being the ending to the actual movie. It was enjoyable to read, my attention didn't wander away to something else half way through. It's kind of sad that we don't get to write and share more work later on, get a bit of a writing/critiquing groove going.
Aaanyway, thanks for putting that up, I'll see you on Thursday unless this cold kills me!
Hi Sunny:
ReplyDeleteThis is an interesting story, I have not seen the movie but now I feel very curious about this movie. Hehe, on the other hand, I want to thank ink to point out and explain the sentence so clear when I read your comment about “thousand lights” I found I always made this mistake as well.
Oh by the way, do we have to post our draft on here? Or we can post the final work only? Thanks
@ Lu,
ReplyDeleteYou can post the draft to get feedback on it, but you don't absolutely have to. Just make sure the last thing you post is your final draft, with a big FINAL in the title so it's easy for the teachers to find.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteHaha, yes, I hate grammar, always my weakest link, thanks for pointing them out for me, I will review it later and correct them all in my final... at least I will try.
ReplyDeleteThe idea is not telling readers what Matrix is, some of the characters I mention in the story basiclly remain as a name only, like Oracle, Morpheus, Merovingian... they are not important as this is between Neo and The Architect, because this is the remake of the ending for Matrix Reloaded, I find it very hard not to mention them in some way, but I will add more for some characters like Trinity as she did appear in the story.
The ending, yes, as you can see this is not really a ending... I still trying to create another blow.
I have never actually seen the movie, but after I read your draft I’m eager to see the Matrix story line compared to your fan fiction and the changes that you have made. Maybe you could add a little bit more detail for us “newbees” to the Matrix, just so that we can relate to the characters more and gain a clearer understanding of what is happening in the story. I also like the way you used a simile to compare the door to a thousand lights; “The door grew like a thousand of lights”, very poetic.
ReplyDeleteAlthough I have not seen this movie, I did have fun reading it. Usually when I’m reading stuff like robots and machines my mind tends to wonder, but for some odd reason I did enjoy reading it.
Oh and don’t worry I feel your pain my grammar isn’t the best either. And yeah that would be awesome if you could add a little something in about some of the characters that would put the icing on the cake.
Can’t wait to see your final copy